Fake profiles and scams: how to spot them and protect yourself

Dating site scams play on what makes us human: desire, curiosity, the need to feel chosen. On adult sites scammers have an extra weapon: shame. Falling into a trap isn't a matter of naivety: the scripts are carefully designed and hit people of every age and level of experience. Learning to recognise fake profiles and the most common tricks is the best defence.

Signs of a fake profile

No single sign is proof, but the more of them add up, the more cautious you should be:

• Photos that are too perfect, like a photo shoot or a magazine, all in the same style and none taken in everyday life.
• A new, almost empty profile with a generic description that could apply to anyone.
• Replies that have nothing to do with what you wrote, as if they were following a script.
• A flood of compliments and intense declarations after just a few messages.
• Requests for intimate photos in the very first messages, or explicit photos sent without you asking: they're often the first step towards blackmail.
• Dramatic or complicated stories: a job abroad, an emergency, a frozen bank account.
• Details that change, such as age, city or job, and constant excuses to avoid a video call or a meeting.

A useful check is a reverse image search, which many search engines offer for free: if the same photo appears under another name, on a modelling site or in a catalogue, you have your answer.

The rush to move to WhatsApp or Telegram

One of the most common signs is pressure to leave the site straight away and continue on WhatsApp, Telegram or another app. The reason is simple: outside the site there are no more blocks, reports or rules, and the scammer gets your number, which often leads to your name, your photos and your contacts.

Someone acting in good faith will understand if you'd rather wait. On Corda Rossa, contact details aren't written in public text and are shared only with the people you choose, when you decide. Until then, the site's chat is more than enough.

Money, top-ups and “tributes”

Sooner or later, in almost every scam, a request for money arrives. It can take a thousand forms: a loan for an emergency, a train ticket to come and see you, a phone top-up, a gift card, a sum to release a parcel or an inheritance. Sometimes it's a cryptocurrency investment that promises guaranteed returns.

In the BDSM scene the request can be dressed up as play: a “tribute” to prove devotion before you've even met. On Corda Rossa any form of payment is forbidden, so anyone who asks for it is already breaking the rules. Watch out for the opposite script too: someone who promises money, perhaps playing the generous benefactor, and then asks for a small sum to “release” the payment.

The rule is simple: never send money, codes, top-ups or gift cards to someone you met online. Ever.

Sextortion: blackmail with intimate photos

Sextortion is blackmail. After an exchange of intimate photos or a video call, perhaps secretly recorded, the scammer threatens to send the images to family, colleagues or friends unless you pay. They often show a list of your social media contacts to seem more credible and pile on the pressure with deadlines of a few hours.

Here's what to do, step by step:

1. Cut off all contact and don't reply to the threats.
2. Keep the evidence: screenshots of the conversation, the profile, the nickname, the numbers and any payment details.
3. Block and report the profile on the site and on every platform they contacted you from.
4. Go to the Polizia Postale and file a report: you can even start from its online police station.
5. Talk to someone you trust: it's easier to face it together.

If you fear your intimate images may be shared, in Italy you can also report it to the Garante per la protezione dei dati personali (the Italian data protection authority), which can take action with the platforms. Sharing intimate images without consent is a crime.

Suspicious links and fake verification sites

Another widespread trap is the link. It arrives in chat with a believable excuse: “verify your age to see my photos”, “sign up to this safety site so I know you're a real person”, “download this app for the video call”. The page looks legitimate, perhaps with a reassuring logo, and asks for your card details “just for verification, you won't be charged anything”.

In reality those sites start expensive subscriptions that are hard to cancel, steal your card details or install malicious software on your phone. The same goes for pages that imitate the login page of a site you use, to steal your password. Corda Rossa never asks you for payment details: a member inviting you to “verify yourself” elsewhere is always a red flag.

What to do: block, report, protect your data

If a profile seems fake to you or a conversation takes a bad turn, you don't need to be certain to act:

• Stop replying: you don't owe anyone an explanation.
• Block the person, from the chat or from their profile.
• Report the message from the chat, using the flag next to it: the moderator sees only that message, not the rest of the conversation. If the problem is the person, report their profile too.
• Never send identity documents, selfies with your ID, tax code, bank details or photos of your card.
• If you opened a suspicious link or entered your password elsewhere, change it immediately and turn on two-step verification.
• If you've already paid, contact your bank immediately and file a police report.

Reporting isn't snitching: a fake profile that isn't stopped with you will try it on someone else.

On Corda Rossa, ads, descriptions and photos are checked before publication, and content reported by a member is suspended immediately pending a check. But no check replaces your own caution: stay in the site's chat until you trust the person, never send money and, if something doesn't add up, block and report.